Finding the Positive

in the negative is something I need to work on if I'm going to survive Peace Corps training (18 more days!). Life is as you perceive it right?

Strip life down to the essentials and you'll soon find your breaking point, what you can handle and what you can't. It seems like everyday I reach my limit of what I'm comfortable with, only to have it stretched further. Training is incredibly challenging, there are so many things to deal with it's exhausting. Simple things like going to the store to buy a banana for lunch or telling my host family when I'll be home for dinner or buying more minutes for my cell phone is EXHAUSTING. My wise LCF (Russian teacher) Inna said to me today, if you can get through this, you can handle a lot of sh*t.

Apart from moving in with a family that doesn't know my language, learning their language in 3 months, adapting to Ukrainian culture, and being prepared to work hard everyday, there are some things I really didn't expect to know how to handle.

What a cock

I didn't expect to eat borsche (a soup made from beets) everyday after telling my host grandma repeatedly the first week that I hated beets. I didn't expect to have (major) digestive problems because my stomach's a f*in wimp. I didn't expect to wake up to our rooster at 6 am everyday. I didn't expect Ukrainian women to look like models off the runway. I didn't expect to not see any fruits of my labor in the community for motivation during training. I didn't expect to walk so much my leg muscles cramp up when I get home from lessons. I didn't expect to share my bedroom as a playroom for the girls (I sleep in a pullout in the living room). And most of all, I didn't expect I could go six days without a shower but here I am, smelly and unshaven (the water's been turned off).

HOWEVER, all these pushed boundaries have made me as flexible as a circus acrobat.

Me! (not really)

I'm more grateful for food, any food, and my taste buds have become more sensitive to flavors and textures. My stomach is... catching up haha. My self-esteem has become more self-reliant and I'm not comparing myself to these models since I don't know what it's like to walk in their heels. I'm appreciating the small victories more and letting the rest roll off my back. I'm physically stronger from all the walking. I'm mentally stronger since my personal bubble has become... non-existent. And the shower part is gross, I know, but at least when I do shower, my bathroom is indoors :)

Here's to realizing the positives, seeing the opportunities, and training's almost over! haha